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Tuesday, December 04, 2007

So, Bigmouth, You Think You Know Viral Marketing?

Viral Marketing

viral marketing is not for dummies

Write the phrase "viral marketing" on your blog and suddenly (you think) you're an internet marketing rock star.  "Heh heh... I'm about to have a video go viral, heh heh..."

Please... shut your face with your viral this and your viral that.  You know what's TRULY viral? Your ignorance. Think about it.  One person gives 10 reasons how to obnoxiously comment on A-list bloggers blogs to get noticed and, within 36 hours, every wannabe who hasn't made a dime repeats the information on their blog.  The result is an avalanche of wanna-be bloggers not just flooding A-list bloggers' comment sections with ridiculous, horrible, nutritionless comments but ridiculous, horrible, nutritionless comments on steroids!

So that you realize how serious I am about this, in that particular instance, I did my best to counter the madness with "Comment Whoring Outside the Box".  I suggest you read it to see a sweet, simple, short analysis on how to REALLY comment whore but without the thundering mass of the herd crushing you.

So What the Heck Is Viral Marketing Anyways?

You should know by now that no one but yours truly, Sam Freedom, is going to tell you in the way you need to hear it.  So I'll break it down for you and put it in a nutshell.  This way, whether or not you agree with me, you'll at least be VERY clear on my definition.

SO VIRAL MARKETING IS...

When you DO or SAY something worth repeating....

SIT DOWN!  I'M NOT DONE YET!

Viral marketing is when you DO or SAY something worth repeating in a way that were an idiot to repeat it, the damage would be minimal.

Yes, idiots repeat all kinds of good information just for the exposure and to feel important so they unwittingly leave out small, but important, pieces of the puzzle that could unwittingly sink your business.  So great viral marketing takes into account the "idiot factor" so that idiots can't regurgitate material in a harmful manner.

So, Pop Quiz...!  Is the Following...

Viral Marketing on Steroids?  Or Viral Marketing on Hemorrhoids?

How About the Following?  Viral Santa?  or Just Plain Silly?

santa sez, viral marketing or just plain silly?
So What Kinds of Things Did You Get Santa to Do?


Sam Freedom"s Internet Marketing Controversy Blog

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4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I got Santa to dance, make out with an elf, levitate, yodel, do a Tarzan yell, jump on the tree, give himself a wedgie, surf the net, riverdance, rap, sing, recite a poem, hit a high note, imitate george bush and do something highly inappropriate to his pet reindeer. What a fantastic holiday time-waster.

Sam Freedom said...

Yes, it is. And you should ask him to spank himself for it.

Unknown said...

that's the best definition of viral marketing I've read or heard to date.

and this ain't just gratuitous comment whoring. ;)

btw - thanks for stopping by the Worst SEO Blog Ever.

Laura said...

"You know what's truly viral? Your ignorance" LOL statement of the day!
I hae to say though, when it comes to viral, it's not always the most scintillating stuff that gets copied. People will repost ridiculous videos, funny pics and all sorts of pointless-but-entertaining stuff all over the world.